Feb 24, 2011

Photo Projects: window shopping

Vienna, 2011

Monchique, Algarve, 2010

Burano, 2003

Burano, 2003

Roma, 2006

Stockholm, 2010

Sandham, 2010

Vienna, 2011

Colentina, 2009

(Un)Lucky Number 77

Bellagio, 2010

I am not a gambler. I don't go to casinos, never joined the Friday poker night at Starcom or bet on any type of competition except of once in three years to National lottery. I once won an ironing machine in a promotion I never participate (but had a shopping card though). Except of that, never won something out of luck.

But all this changes when I am in Vegas. And I had been lucky enough :) to go there 4 times. It's becoming a frenzy. It's like an urge to try my luck. Is not that I am gambling but I am winning. Always on the slot machines. Only on the slot machines. Only on the Blazing 7s slot machines with a specific combination. I don't give a damn about blackjack rules or never tried to throw the dices. But I have a bullet proof technique on winning on my blazing 777.

My criteria: 1. I need to be alone; 2. I need to be in the Puparo mood. 3. It's technical (no of machines, time spend per machine, how many times I tap or pull the lever, how often I change them and so on and on). 4. Knowing when to stop.

In four times in Vegas I have always won. Not much but enough to get back important part of my shopping list in US. And constantly. You might think that point 3 & 4 above are the most important. It might be so. But I know that is about 1 (I never won if Cami stayed near me) but mostly 2.
Something happens when I am staying there and staring to the rotating lines and hearing the obsessive permanent machine sounds. Is like every number is a soul that interacts with me and I have the magical power to influence and stop it when  and how I wont. It's maybe my pact with the devil and I grab my payment. Or it might be just a pure luck.

But sometimes, when I stay there and have the first 2 sevens lined up, in the remaing second until the last column needs to stop from rotating, I am thinking that maybe I am too manipulative to those souls and I need to let them go. 

So, the number remains 77 only and I am loosing. But maybe that 77th soul is the most luckiest one. I might never find out the truth.

Feb 20, 2011

Betrayed Confidence

Covasna, 2011

I hate when is happening and 
I hate the fact I need to face this. 
But I hate more that this happened, 
so I will face this

Feb 17, 2011

Me as a teacher

Prof Mircea Eremia, UPB, Energetica, 2005
Nobody was interested to hear about my sex life (thank God cause I don't know how I would have managed) so this is to you Alex.

I like to teach, I like to explain and lead people into discovering things. When I was a teenager I never thought I would be able to do this. Being a rather shy person during high school I never imaged myself pursuing a teaching career. It was only later, at the university, when I discovered and experience it. 

I first try it in the last year of university and then, after coming back from France and passing my exams, my mentoring professor asked me to do some seminars on his behalf. So I was a 24 y.o. person explaining technical things to students one year younger. I remember only the huge fear I experienced in the first minutes and that, at the end of first month, a former colleague came to me saying something like " you know, my girlfriend is in your class, maybe you can help her a bit ..." See, is never to early to start being tempted in this country :( I still don't know why the professor had this confidence in me. I guess the fact I was working my ass off to help him DTPying his book had a role in it ...
Two years later, after starting my first real job in press distribution, I had a management course which I paid as a personal development initiative. Two weeks after I finished they asked me to keep this further as a teacher. Did I refused?

Then was the Word, Windows, Excel and Corel Draw classes. Can you imagine someone paid me to be a teacher for that? And also later happened that I performed public meetings presenting products and money making mechanism in a multilevel marketing organization I was very actively involved in back in 1996.

What's left of it? Nothing much of teaching techniques but some very useful experiences, the ability of talking fearlessly in front of bigger audiences, a very structured approach to the information and a logic way to present it. All this made my life very easy much later when I had to lead people or perform hundreds of presentations in front of new clients.

And hopefully  this will help me in the most difficult task which began when my first kid reached the school age.

Feb 16, 2011

Feb 14, 2011

The state of normality

Mamaia 2011

I am passing through a very difficult period of my life. Mainly because of workload but mostly because of my attitude towards work and life in general. 500% commitment and involvement, strong will to succeed, no break and in an impossible state of mind that give me no peace and allow me no form of real relaxation. This persists for more than 3 months by now and I am really concerned about it.

In the middle of this period, last Friday we went for Petre & Andreea marriage. It was a shock. A lovely, surprising, normal weekend. Full of peace, love and normality. I forgot about problems, stress, addictions and any kind of troubles my mind is experiencing. At some point, before leaving for Bucharest we passed by the lake in the way for my relatives in Navodari. 

I had to stop. I turned on the continuous line and pulled over to shoot this scene. Not only that was extremely photographic, not only that was amazingly interesting but it looked like my current life. Agitated, strong winds, hard to stay stable, not sure it is raining or it's sunny and me and all birds around me trying to escape. I stayed there and took some shots in the strong wind, looking at the strange lake all tormented, frozen and wet.

Two hours later we came back. Wind has stopped. Lake was looking as a regular lake in the winter. We said good bye to our friends. Small raindrops started to fall when we left. I drove peacefully for two hours in the dark before reaching our home. I had a profound and relaxed sleep.

Sweet state of normality, wish you stay around for good!

Feb 9, 2011

Quick Poll

1. About Traveling
2. Sex Life
3. Being a parent
4. Me as a teacher

Resulted after a quick browsing on my unfinished posts. 
I bet 10:1 I know which one would you chose :)

Feb 8, 2011

The confiscated you

Cris, 2009

When I used to work in the media agency, like most of my ambitious colleagues, I used to work a lot. For those of you close to the media world it is clear that there is no other way. Not if you want to make it. An agency lives out its employees enthusiasm and out of the tremendous energy and individual and group ambitions. Lovely and inspiring world.

But I also remember very well that before I realized it had become too much. Way too much. 
Like I-used-to-work-one-weekend-out-of-two-for-almost-two-years kind of too much. As you can imagine this was done by sacrificing on my family and my personal time.
I can't blame anyone but me for that, I don't regret it and I would do it the same  And this is not a soft skill time management lecture I am trying to do here. Nor to blame any particular employer. This is not even about too much work.

This is about you. Or me. Or anyone of us letting someone or something confiscate ourselves. 

Because when you reach the point when, due to work, ambition, love, vice or any other kind of addiction, you forget about your real needs, desires, principles or aspirations, than something has confiscated you. 

And you might do your best to shine but on the inside the rottenness has started.
And it will take guts to face the truth and a tremendous amount of work and will to revert it.